Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The Other Perfect First Line

Hey all,

Last Wednesday, I talked about my contest and the Perfect First Line for a book.  But as I was writing it out for posting I realized there is another first that is just as important in any romance.

The first time you actually speak to a potential lover.

Now we've all heard those ridiculous types of first pick up lines.  There are lists of them online and of course, who hasn't seen the TV shows where some guy tries to pick a girl up in a bar and comes out with a beaut like...

"What's your sign?"

Wow!  Boring much? 

But I've got to admit, some lines can be intriguing, even if they are a little silly or even overused.  And though I rarely used first lines with my characters as a hook (they usually meet in some other dramatic way), I have a few times, so I've done my research.

Here are a few of my favorites.

1.  Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? 
2.  When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you. 
3.  If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. 
4.  Do you have a Bandaid? Cos I just scraped my knee falling for you.
5.  Do you have a map? Cos Honey, I just keep gettin lost in your eyes. 
6.  It's not my fault I fell in love. You are the one that tripped me. 
7.  Wow!  If you were a laser, you'd be set on "stunning". 
8.  Your legs must be tired because you've been running through my dreams all night.
9.  If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
10. Is there a rainbow today? I just found the treasure I've been searching for! 

And these...guaranteed to send the person screaming from the room.

1.  If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
2.  My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in.
3.  Excuse me, but does this smell like chloroform to you?
4.  I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
5.  Do you live on a chicken farm? [No] You sure know how to raise cocks.
6. Wow! Are those real?   
7.  You are so beautiful that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I'm 20. 
8.  Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open? 
9.  If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
10. I wanna floss with your pubic hair.  

Can we say ick!  Seriously, do any of these work?  Or are the recipients so shocked or laughing so hard, the person giving the line thinks they've actually done what they've set out to do?

Some of the ones in the first category I might laugh at and depending on how I read the guy offering them, I might allow a conversation, but I'd know it was a line.  Whether he wants to me to tickle his pickle or he's scraping his knee falling for me, I sure as hell would know it wasn't anything serious.  First lines in a relationship are just like what they are in a book.

A way to hook you and get you to take a second look.

So how about you all?  Do you have a favorite pick up line?  One that made your ick factor hit mach 10?  Or did your significant other use a line that had you turning into mush?  Did you use one on them?  Let me know in the comments below.  I'd love to add your funny or sweet perfect first line to my list!

See you on Friday with another guest blog from the amazing Eva Gordon!!!

Hugs to all,

 CJ England

Follow Your Dreams


1 comment:

Phylis said...

I always thought the line "If I said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me?", was very cheesy. And I was right cause Britney Spears made a pop song out of it! I'm hoping it's tongue in cheek cause it is so very sad if it isn't!